Today is a bad day, today I lost something that I have only had for a few months but since losing it have realised that it is something that I should have had for the majority of my adult life and something I should have for the remainder of my life.
Today I lost my beard.
It started like every other day, 06:30 my kitten wakes me up by attacking my face and feet. I put her in the kitty litter and wait for her to wee, I go downstairs, she follows. I iron a shirt, play with her until she stops wanting to play.
It is now 07:00 and I need to shower, I head to the bathroom and look in the mirror. I like what I see. I notice that my beard has become slightly unruly and needs a small trim. I get to work trimming my beard. Alas my beard trimmer, usually a perfectionist of a machine, malfunctions and goes from a 5 to 1 with a single push tearing an inch of hair from my face, part of me dies.
I look at myself with a single tear falling from my left eye (in respect for Lisa Left Eye Lopez RIP). I realise that there is nothing else I can do but trim the rest. I do this through my own tears and the screams of terror from onlookers. I am left with my irish heritage shining like the translucent face of the recently undead.
Today has been a horrible day, my face has been cold and lonely. In addition, people have commented on my lack of beard like it is a disease (which it is).
My housemate Melissa screamed when she saw me and genuinely wept with the loss of my beard. She said I looked older and should probably go into hiding until such time as I was presentable again.
I will not let this deter me. I will overcome this set back in my life, probably the worst so far, and make it – make me – a better person.
Today is the start of something, the start of a new beard. Maybe I will use what I learnt in the past few months to create something better, a beard 2.0.